Thursday, June 09, 2005

okey its been a long time.. I know

Well I went off the deep end with this thyroid.. since they destroed my thryoid i have to watch for sings and symptoms of hypothyroid.. which is depression basically and weight gain. So .. yes, I got the lovely depression. Horrible, thats about how to describe it. Feeeling horrible sad about nothing you can actually pinpoint.

Now i have this anxiousness, where I am just anxious about everything.


Gotta love them *rolls eyes*

So I just called the dr.s office, since i went in and had a blood test last week. They are going to call in a new prescription..cause I'm a bit low on T3. So 75 mcg instead of 100 mcg. i was like. wataminute.. I know 70 is less than 100.. They said.. no its not.


Apparently in micrograms.. less is more.. ;)

weird measurement people making things more difficult for us. :P

So thats been going on ...whihc is a pain in the ass to say the least.. to be crying and mopey all the time is NOT fun ..

So I've been studying.. doing papers.. crap like that.
.. trying not to inflict the cruddy stuff on people.

I got a new computer.. woot woot *throws confetti*
my last computer was *refurbished* which in Dell talk, means paperweight. See if I had known that.. I wouldnt have bought it.. *sighs*

So now i have a Gateway.. *crosses fingers*

Its better than Scott's which he just got a couple months ago.

All good things come to those who wait.

Well I waited til my computer went to shit and I couldnt do anything with it.. then I told Scott if i dont get a new computer I'm gonna kill someone.. so .. we got a new computer.. yayayyayay

and speaking of killing things..

My son and I went to his conference on Tuesday..

You remember him.. the one that tells me every night there is no homework and he has nothing to do and yet.. he is failing his classes. Not all of them of course.. just certain ones.

So anyhooow there were bout 7 advisors sitting at the table when he and I went in . He had to sit at the foot of the table.. at the end .. so they could all stare at him. (see i think thats where I went wrong in my parenting.. I need a longer table.. and chairs so we can sit around him and stare him into submission)

So, the school psychologist, attendance lady, guidance counselor, disciplinary guy, head of language arts, head of heck I dont know.. social studies i think. and head of math/science.

All staring at my son.. and me .. but heck I wasnt the one in trouble.

So they were looking at his record and they said.. Hey! we dont get many GATE kids here..


GATE ... Gifted and Talented um somthing.. kids. (that e probably had something to do with homework, which my son doesnt do) :P

So... yes.. no GATE kids usually there.. because more thna likely they do their work.

So then they went thru all his testings.. and they were like. so kid.. why arent you doing your work?

he said.. well.. I dont know.

so then they said.. why arent you doing your work in Language arts.

He said.. well when i first went to class.. I didnt like Ms. L .. I thought she was weird.

So then .. they said.. you thought she was weird???


So then you decided not to do your homework because you thought she was weird.?


okey I dont blame them.. i was in a bit of a shock there too. and thinking my son is nuts.

So then.. they said.. so you were punishing her because you didnt do your homework.. the only one who is getting punished is you.

I said.. no kidding.. we've taken everything away from him.. and then even offered good stuff if he pulled his grades up.. and he does nothing. He is supoosed to be bringing me reports every Friday and he says certain teachers are gone on Fridays.. I mean I wish I was a teacher here.. they get every fricking Friday off it seems.

Every night I ask him if he has homework and every night he doesnt have any.

Apparently he has an agenda for Math that he is supposed to be writing his homework in.

So i did say i didnt particulalry like that one teacher either. When we had last parent teacher conferences. The one i went to. This teacher said.. ewll how did he get into GATE anyway? Did he test or what?

I took offense to that.

As if my son didnt belong there.

All testings did prove he should be there.. when i brought that up to the committee on Tuesday they said.. yes he deserves to be there. He was in the 98th percentile in somethings and average in others.. but he deserved to be there.

Anyhow.. they called him on all his lies and said.. look.. the GATE program is a privilege, and there is a waiting list for people to get into this program. We need to know that you will be doign the work.. because if you dont.. we will pull you out andgive your seat to someone who wants it.

(at that point I was gonna cheer Mr. B the disciplinary guy.. woot woot Mr. B!!)

Told them I have been telling son for half the year if he didnt pull his head out of his butt and do his work.. and stop failing these classes, get in gear, they would fail him.. and that he wouldnt be able to be in the same grade as his friends.. my son kept saying.. no not gonna happen.. I said. .yes it will.. and look here we are.

I also said.. that he would be in summer school.. and of course the last 2 weeks of school now he has been valiently trying to pull his grades up. Too little too late.

Anyhow.. now he needs summer schoool, and if he doesnt get C's or better in his classes in the first trimester next year.. he is out of the GATE program.

And thy want him in therapy for a couple of sessions to figure out what happened this year and why he has been a slacker. (his words, not mine.. son is a slacker LOL)

So I said .. fine.. sounds good to me.

Course now that its therapy, you know whose fault this whole school year is going to be..? of course.. its gonna be MY fault..

I was never there.. I was working full time.. I was in school on the weekends, I was sick with my hyperthyroid..

So I can forsee this will be fun.

The daughter has been okey .. but i hate the fact that I keep shelling out money for new jeans.. new shirts. and then she stands there.. and says.. "I have nothing to wear"

she needs a job..

Okey gotta run.. test tonight..

Love to you all !!

obsidian :)


Blogger aibee said...

75mcg IS lower than 100. (and is, imo, a questionably small dose for someone who's thyroid has been destroyed, but that's an aside...)

I'm assuming you take 100mcg of synthetic T4 (generically referred to over here as thyroxine), and not 100mcg of a T3/T4 combination medication.

Lesson time: the body converts the inert T4 into the active thyroid hormone, T3, as needed, which is why standard treatment is to supply the body only with T4.

I would also assume the logic behind lowering your does is that it looks like 100mcg has increased your T4 blood levels, enough so they think it may be supressing T3 conversion. Or not. I'm jut making it up as I go along. Ahem.

Have you been to the Mary Shomon thyroid forums? I learned a shit of a lot there about my thyroid condition there, and what I learned ultimately got me feeling better than any idiot 'all you need is T4 and you also need an antidepressant because it's NOT the thyroid meds making you want to throw yourself off a cliff' doctor ever could. Fuck that shit. My T3 levels were within range, but I was in a depression so deep, I contemplated suicide. With the help of those forums, I realised I wasn't going nuts, so did my research and found a doctor who listened to how I felt, and who wasn't hung up on how I *should* feel according to my blood levels, and within two days of changing my meds, a light came on, my depression lifted, and I got my life back.

I'm not saying this is what you should do. I suppose what I'm saying is that research is your friend. You've entered the realms of thyroid disorder, and it is such a personal journey to get your meds right. I found doctor telling me how I *should* feel, based on my blood levels, but in my personal experience, blood levels count for shit. On straight T4, my levels were text book stuff (mid range T4 and T3) and a delight to behold, but I wanted to die. With a change in meds, my blood levels ended up looking pretty dinky (bottom end T4, low end T3), but I felt good.

I wish you well on your journey back to feeling good too.


7:27 PM  
Blogger obsidian said...

Thank you Aibee!! :)

I know.. I have my up days and my down days.. I am steadily gaining weight it seems and thats freaking me out.. Yes I know.. exercise *shudders*

I'm in the midst of changing my school/work routine.. trying to eat right.. and I do some stretching exercises.. but nothing so healthy that its considered regular exercise.

I know that, everyone knows that.. exercise is the key to everything.. but I'm lazy.

Sooooo will be working on that as well.. i refuse to gain everythig back. Espcially since i think this stupid thyroid thing made me gain weight before I lost it.


So.. anyhow.. I will be working on me for a while here.

diet, findig exercise, adjusting meds, etc.

Will also peruse the thyroid forums again.

I will be normal again..


least I think so.


8:07 AM  

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